Working a full time job while having bipolar can be a difficult task and there are days i wish I was just a stay-at-home mom. My bipolar disorder comes with a host of other disorders like social anxiety and depression. So being out in the world can be taxing to me at different times of the year.
When I was much younger I had a very hard time keeping any job at all, I found it very debilitating to try and work a full time job while having s many mental challenges every day. I what I mean by mental challenges was an out of control disorder that was not diagnosed. I understand that now but while I was in the mix of it i was very unaware of what was happening.
For instance i went through jobs like they were going out of style. I would last maybe 3 to 6 months at each job. Constantly telling my parents the people I worked for where the problem. In my mind people where constantly stating trouble with me, I played the victim each and every time I lost a job or quit. I would say things like “They were constantly picking on me,” or “I didn’t do anything they kept starting with me.” I know now that i was blaming everyone else for my problems and not taking the blame for anything. I was very self centered I guess you could say.
When I left the job I would feel like a failure and then the pattern of depressions would overwhelm me and i wold lay in bed for days on end not doing anything. My parents would joke around and say was forever retired, but I know inside they had the faintest idea how to handle a 20 something with absolutely no drive or care in the world to work or for that matter leave the house. I am an adult, you can’t force an adult. Or can you?
There are many challenges related to having bipolar disorder and keeping a job. However, experts say that work can actually be quite helpful to people with bipolar disorder.
Work can give people a sense of structure, reduce depression, and increase confidence. This may help to enhance overall mood and empower you.
If you are a parent dealing with a adult child who acts likes this than I hear to tell you – you better force them or else noting will change. If this article sounds a lot like you than I am telling you – pay attention. You are in a depressive mode and you need to be snapped out it. You have two choices either get help or don’t and stay the same way you are forever. It sounds harsh but you need to hear it. These are he words my mother would say to me over and over again and i would listen to her, go to the doctor, get medication, stay on the medication till I felt better and then go off the medication and fall back into a depressive mode again. Still sound like you?
I know i can say this now I’m twenty years into this disorder and i know the triggers and can sense when i am spiraling out of control. But I was taught by my mom to snap out of it so many times that it became a learned behavior. It’s a habit, its a mental awareness, it’s realizing that you are not well and need help. I till wish i was a stay-at-home mom, I still wish was retired and could stay home all day and do nothing. But what i realized is i can’t even do that-I get bored being home too long now. The overwhelming feeling of being a failure scares me too much and I can hear my mom in the back of my head bothering me day in and day out to get up and get moving.
How can you start the habit?
- First of all realize that you have the problem. Think of it like a 12 step program and realize there are steps (habits) to build upon in order to realize what is happening and change the behavior for good.
- Get help – you cannot do this alone and you shouldn’t. You need a therapist and a psychiatrist. Your parents are not going to cut it, you need an outside source that is unbiased to tell you the truth about your condition.
- Grab a disorder app like Daylio. I love Daylio because i can customize it to fit my feelings on a daily basis. It allows me to track my feelings three or four times a day. Another words even though its digital it something checking in on me when I’m too busy in my own head to check in on myself. Adding entries to the app will create a habit for you to care about your well being.
- Find a mantra or daily quote online. I know your on your phone, so put it good use because looking at what everyone else is doing is not going to help. So find a motivational quote for the day and post it to Facebook, Instagram and whatever else you need to do in order for you to remember the quote all day. I save mine to my lock screen on bad days.
- If you fail like I did so many times remember its a learning experience. all of life is and everyday we learn a little more about the world, about ourselves. It’s OK-just don’t give up. Each day is a fresh new start to start again.